Sunday, September 02, 2007

Ain’t No Fun When You Gotta Run

It was my painful duty yesterday to embark on a “Fun Run”. Now, in my experience the words Fun and Run are a contradiction in terms. I can see no fun at all in running and to be honest no necessity to do so. For me, the only possible use for running would be in any instance where one was unlucky enough to find oneself chased by a lion or a tiger, not common occurrences in this part of the world and still not an experience that could ever be classed under the term “fun”.

Anyway, on the basis that it was for charity and that it was only 5K I reluctantly said that I would have a go. However between my offering to take part and the actual day I had hatched a cunning plan.

I am a member of a walking group. To say a walking group perhaps gives the impression that we manfully (and womanfully) stride up Munros and the like every Saturday barely breaking sweat in the process. This is however an outrageous fallacy. In fact we amble rather idly through the least hilly paths we can find. As you can imagine in Scotland that takes a huge amount of research and preparation so it is no mean feat in itself.

Therefore it was decided that the members of the walking group would, merely by dint of being in the walking group, not be required to run. Instead we would turn up on the day and proceed to walk with no fear of humiliation or retribution.

We turned up at the allotted time and were given our numbers. Ominously mine was 13 which is never a good sign. I had expected a good number of the walking group to turn up to support our quest for a run free fun run, but in the event only another two turned up. Nonetheless it was walking we were doing and we strode out as the runners (after having gone through a very serious looking limbering up session) streamed past us. Our striding soon became our usual amble and pretty soon we were chatting and not really too worried about what time we would come in at.

Due to the cyclical nature of the design of the course (to try to maximise our embarrassment perhaps) we had only just set out when the first runners passed us on the way back. It couldn’t be said that they looked like they were enjoying themselves so we took some comfort from that.

Eventually we returned back to the start after a very pleasant stroll. By the time we got back to the start (5K in 1 ½ hours which I thought was a splendid time) the award ceremony was over and the organisers had given up and gone home. Sadly we didn’t get a medal or any plaudits for our achievement but equally we had not had to go through any of the agony. We might even be persuaded to do 10K next time.

12 comments:

auntiegwen said...

How I empathise, I run only to be able to eat more than once a week and fit into my jeans. There is definitely no fun involved in it for me either.

Omega Mum said...

On the one and only major bike ride I did, a hideously named 'sweep van' followed the slowest riders, scooping them up if they were too slow. At least you were spared that humiliation.

Kolley Kibber said...

Well done, Gwen. But never think you're totally immune to the lure of running. From a walk, it starts with a slight quickening, and before you know it you're marching, then trotting, and then it's 10k three times a week, in the most miserable February gales with rain lashing your stinging skin and a nose so cold you can no longer feel it drip.

Running - it's great.

Gwen said...

I feel your pain Gwen. I'm afraid that I just stick to walking and buy a bigger jeans size so I salute your efforts.

That would have been awful Omega Mum. I am certainly lucky that that didn't happen.

I will take your word for the joys of running ISBW and will remember to check myself if I find my pace quickening from a walk to something which might lead to 10K runs.

Squirmy Popple said...

I think it's very impressive that you attempted to do the run at all, even if it did take you an hour and a half. I always seem to injure myself when I try to run...

Gwen said...

Well, Katie we didn't get past first gear. There was no way we were going to even contemplate doing any damage.

Valentine Suicide said...

I would have been happy to join you on a 5K run G, but my physician has advised me against doing anything that might mess up my hair...

Sorry.

Anonymous said...

I think you deserve a medal for agreeing to do it in the first place! Running isn't my sort of thing either but then again, neither is walking. Well done anyway.

Crystal xx

Unknown said...

I'm full of admiration for you for signing up for the run. I did briefly take up fell running some years ago ... I'm not sporty or athletic at all, but my ex-husband was ... he tried very hard to persuade me and I attempted squash, swimming, badminton, golf and even skiing in an attempt to be more of a participant than a spectator! Sadly, it didn't work and I'm back to being a couch potato!

muddyboots said...

well done!or should l say brave??

Kelly Innes said...

Fun and run- oxymoron. And that's all I have to say about that....except well done- you are a better woman than I. I come home out of breath after the walk from the car!

Gwen said...

I'll believe you VS. Thousands wouldn't.

I beleive that there were medals Crystal. We just got back about an hour too late to receive any.

I'm full of admiration for you Funky Munky for attempting all that. I don't think that I could have done.

Thanks Muddy Boots. They do say that bravery can come very close to stupidity at times!

Thanks Kelly. I know the feeling of being out of breath after very little exertion.